Monday, June 11, 2012

A New Season of Life!


For quite some time, I have been hinting around on my Facebook page that something exciting is going to happen. Well, it may or not be exciting to you, but it certainly is very exciting to our family.
But first, the bad news.... Did you really think I was going to tell you the good stuff so soon?! Of course not.

*Gulp!* This is my current(biggest) weight..there it is, for all to see...

The bad news is, I'm fat. I no longer fall under the categories of cubby, big boned, thick and/or solid. I'm fat. I have myself to move beyond my "normal" weight, I haven't seen my high school weight since, well, high school and I am past all my pregnancy weights. Did you hear that? I am carrying more now than I did when I had a watermelon-sized child in my uterus.
And unfortunately, I'm not one of those women that seem to carry their weight well. I do know these type of women, they weight is distributed evenly all over their body, and by today's standard, their overweight, but they carry it so well you wish you could be them. Or maybe these women just have a better wardrobe than I do. Whatever.
Anyways, I'm fat. And not just that- I'm sloppy fat. Remember that woman I mentioned above? Well I'm her bipolar sister. My fat is there, but it just sort of hangs there. Like floppy boobs. Not too many people like floppy boobs. Imagine having floppy boobs on your arms, your stomach, you upper legs, and a little floppy boob under your chin…and that's me. And at first they were small floppy boobs, but now…they're ginormous floppy boobs hanging out every which way, minus the breastfeeding abilities. It's come to a point where I'm uncomfortable in my own skin- and I hate it. I hate the fact that I've allowed my body to have this much added weight. I hate the fact that I am too tired half the time to do anything productive with my kids. I hate the fact that I can't go up a few steps without feeling like I'm going to fall over in exhaustion. I hate that if I stand too long, my hips and back start to cry out in pain (because of having to support all my weight).

Can you tell I hate this additional fat that has attached itself to my body?

But, after taking a health and wellness class, seeing both my parents die before reaching 60 due to weight-related issues that could have been prevented and this *uncomfortable
feeling* I can't shake, I finally decided something's got to give. And no, it will not be my non-stretchy pants.
Okay, now that I've depressed you to the point where you want to grab a bag of chocolates and cry yourself to sleep (oh, wait, maybe that's only me…).


Since I can't do this...


Now, are you ready for the good news? Okay, here it is. After much debate and semi-thought (And comparison shopping a bit, of course!)This is the first idea I came up with…
My new, pimped out ride
   Ta-da! I got a bike! This is big news for me. I haven't owned a bike since I was 13. That was also the last time I saw a normal weight. After that, I was either transported everywhere thanks to my dad, kind neighbors and the public transportation system. I rarely walked. And, ever since becoming a homeschooling mom, my activity has been even more limited due to trying(and re-trying) to finish "doing it all" in a day. I've really let myself go. Well, no more!
All of my children have bikes. I wanted a bike, and now I have one. I not only have a way of losing weight, but I also have a way of getting around(locally) without being a hindrance to anyone. I'm getting the dreaded "E" word without it feeling like the dreaded "E" word. I used to love to bike. My kids love to bike. And now, I have no excuses (aside from bad weather, of course).
I'm going to start small. Right now, my goal is getting back into the habit of biking and getting comfortable biking. Not to lose weight. Yet.
Next time I blog, I'm going to share several additional resources that I hope to use over the course of the summer to get myself more accustomed to healthy eating. Most of them are free. All are super-exciting to me J
I didn't intend on making this blog into a weight-loss blog. I probably never will. This blog is about the life of my family. The seasons in it, all seasons. No, I do not intend on talking about my weight/healthy eating/physical activity forever. This is a season of life that I hope to share with all of you. I'm not saying it will be beautiful, because going against old habits never is. It's going to raw. It might have some curse words in it. I may type while crying. I may end up selling this bike on Craig's list and buying some bigger clothes with the money once I can't take the pain anymore.
Regardless, I'm going to try. And, just like when I started online college, I am telling everyone I know so that I can be held accountable. You don't have to cheer me on. All I ask is that you read the blog when I post. Even better, share it on your social networking sites, so I know someone out there is reading this. If you want to throw a comment of encouragement on here or on my Facebook page, or do 21 questions about my changes, even better! I welcome all comments.
Here's to a new season of life- a healthier one!
Jennafer

2 comments:

  1. I am soooo cheering you on! You go girl! You write beautifully and your determination inspires me!

    ReplyDelete